From 2015, when I was visiting Japan: Why find yourself when you can lose yourself? I’m in a cramped room in Itabashi, squeezed into the middle of three narrow bunk beds reading Martin Amis on Lolita. I’m always reading when I travel: in airplanes, subways, and air-conditioned convenience stores while my friends buy cheap beer. There are five other people staying in this Airbnb. It's cheap–slightly under $30 a night. The host is a Japanese guy currently working on his masters in mathematics. He began renting out his place because he wanted to interact with more English speakers back in college. I admire people like that, who decide they want a certain type of community and then promptly go on to construct it. I can never find in myself the desire.
James Salter said, “Life is weather. Life is meals.” I don’t know why exactly, but it came to mind when I was reading this.
I think that it is simultaneously true that we'll never find what we're searching for, and that searching for what we want slowly becomes less important with time, and is replaced by just giving in to experience.
this is incredible, liminal spaces, "Is my hand on the steering wheel?"
also — if inspiration strikes, of course — i would love to read more about your dislike of travel culture... i've had some of the same thoughts, and just haven't been able to put my finger on how / why / what makes me put-off yet still want to travel for different reasons?
**how do you live with yourself when you know who you are?**
Holy shit. Yeah.
I always look forward so much to reading you! Is like all the feelings I feel put into words I can’t quite express myself. Thank you!
"...here’s what I was always looking for back when I had no words to describe the yearning."
I loved every single word of this. 💛